(1 minute read)
Many people will admit to having a ‘poor relationship’ with feedback in the workplace.
This dislike often arises when the feedback clashes with our preferred way of doing things or thinking, causing a phenomenon known as cognitive conflict. It can also cause the amygdala to perceive a physical or social threat, leading to shutting down or retreating from the situation.
Famous for his less-than-subtle approach, Chef Gordon Ramsay recently shared that when he delivers feedback to those around him in the kitchen, he typically observes one of two types of response.
- The amygdalin response, where the receiver feels threatened by the feedback, and quickly shifts into a ‘fight or flight’ response (neither of which will advance their culinary skills).
- They stop what they are doing, listen to what’s on offer (despite the manner of delivery) and consider how they can implement the suggestions.
Gordon Ramsay’s underlying messages of feedback to any chef or hospitality staff he coaches boils down to a simple mantra, “Take it Professionally – not Personally”.
The difference lies in whether the receiver of the feedback chooses to get defensive, or to get better.
There’s a brilliant framework that helps here. Psychologists Avraham Kluger and Dina Nir call it Feedforward, where in place of obsessing over what was done wrong, and how that may impact self-confidence, it encourages us to ask:
“What can I do next time?”
“How can I improve from here?”
So, when you next receive feedback which you perceive as overly critical, consider that there is good intent from the feedback giver, and slow down any reactive responses to consider how you can move forward from the situation.